About that time again

Well since I have gotten used to never posting I guess it is about time I posted something on here. A few updates...... Still using Mike Davies as my trainer and I love him an will probably always use him. You just know it when you find the one, kind of like a great pair of shoes! LOL! Well, since the race pics above, I actually ran another race and would have probably done better than the first had one of my students not fallen just at my heels. I figure if I did not stop and help him it would really look bad on my part and to tell you the truth I thought I could make up the time. I was wrong. I came in right at 30 min which is bad for me. I am doing Race For the Cure in October and that is another "just for fun with friends" kind of thing and then that will be it. I have had a really good off season so far but mentally I have struggled with gaining what normally is a "normal" amount of weight. I think when you have tiny clothes you fit into a few months out of the year it is really mentally challenging when they don't fit the rest of the time. That has been really hard for me! So much so that I emailed Mike and told him I was too fluffy and it was causing me to be depressed and I was leaving on vacation in just under 12 wks and was not bikini worthy. So, I got my wish. I am now on a leaning diet. Let me tell you, after being back on strict dieting I have decided that I need to be careful what I wish for and work on my mental attitude. I truly was working on it but it became too exhausting. I just said screw it I cannot stand this feeling as if nothing fits. Let me just tell you, I followed the before off season diet to a T and took my allowed cheats and I still felt huge but I was getting things that I have never allowed myself in my entire life so what is my mental state suppose to be? Supportive? I think not, not when you are getting things like, steak, mixed nuts, yes the PLANTERS kind, dried apricots and a ton of other things! It was the best diet ever! Well now after sending him pics I am ordered to do 2 cardio sessions a day.I knew I should not have sent the bootie pick:0